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Obtaining Guardianship for My Autistic Son

Now that my son Kyle is sixteen, his IEP meetings are rather routine. While I talk with his teacher and therapists, Kyle roves about the room, smiling, and making occasional comments. At his most recent meeting we discussed his progress—how he’s been improving his eye contact and social behaviors, how he loves to cook, and how he can balance a simple checkbook. We excitedly congratulated him on his first public speech—which he gave in his communications class in front of typical students. Before his speech day, we had written the text of the speech together, and he was able to … Continue reading →

Ten Rules of Conversation for Asperger Teens

Children with Asperger’s Disorder sometimes have a difficult time relating to peers due to their social awkwardness and narrow, often obsessive, interests. Especially during adolescence, these kids want to make friends and even date but they misinterpret important social cues. For example, they might speak too loudly or get too close, making other teens uncomfortable. They might talk incessantly about their peculiar hobbies, leaving peers perplexed at how to relate. They might have odd behaviors which tip-off classmates that something about them is unusual, yet it’s subtle enough that it doesn’t appear to be a disability. So peers think, “That … Continue reading →

8 Difficult Autistic Behaviors (And Why They Happen)

Children with autism have numerous challenging behaviors for parents to deal with. Sometimes the behaviors seem to make no sense whatsoever. The child might seem unreachable, temperamental, and impossible to deal with. However, when we take a look at the underlying deficits that contribute to the problems, we can gain a better understanding. And with a little understanding, we are better equipped to find ways to help. The following is a list of eight typical behaviors of an autistic child, and their likely causes. This is not an exhaustive list of all autism symptoms, and some autistic children will only … Continue reading →

The WRONG Way to Praise Your Child

Is there ever a wrong way to praise your son or daughter? Every child needs to hear that he or she is loved, appreciated, and good at something. Giving your child positive feedback can build confidence, self-esteem, and create an ongoing desire to keep trying. However, if you’re not careful, your compliments can have the opposite result. Praise requires balance to be effective. Here are three “don’ts” when it comes to praising your child: Don’t use the same phrase over and over again. Saying “Good girl,” repeatedly sounds like training language for a dog. Even “good job,” “awesome,” or “wow” … Continue reading →

When Your Child Wants REVENGE

In my early experiences of trying to discipline my stepdaughter with ADHD, things got really rough. I mentioned in a previous blog that on one occasion we found that a can of paint had been mysteriously opened and poured purposely across our bathroom cabinets. We also found holes dug in the walls after we had tried standing her in the corner on an occasion when her behavior was outrageous. She had sneakily taken her fingernails and dug deep pits into the walls. How she did it without being observed is a mystery. On another occasion, she scribbled all over the … Continue reading →

The EYES Have It: How Eye Contact Can Transform Your Child

in your eyes– the light the heat– in your eyes– I am complete– in your eyes– I see the doorway to a thousand churches– in your eyes– the resolution of all the fruitless searches– in your eyes — Peter Gabriel The Power of Eye Contact There is a dramatic, powerful human connection that takes place when two people gaze into each other’s eyes. Its effect has marveled people throughout time. Eye-to-eye gaze between two individuals can send the subconscious message, “I see you. I want to understand you; I want you to understand me. I care about you.” In the … Continue reading →