Pharmacy Fever

by Kristyn Crow | More from this Blogger

10 Oct 2006 07:57 AM

You might say that I frequent the pharmacy down the street. You might even say that I frequently frequent it. I have my regular parking space there, and I know the pharmacists on a first-name basis. Those druggists are like my two favorite bartenders. And I don't drink.

"Hi Joan. Hello, Ralph."

"Hello Kristyn. The usual?"

"Yep. But make it a double this time."

"A double wammy. You got it."

They start loading my bag up with meds. And I mean M-E-D-S. Remember that I have a family of nine which includes two diabetics (their stuff alone takes up half my kitchen cabinet space), and two kids with ADHD on Adderall, and another on an ACE inhibitor. I've also got a teenager on several wacky acne treatments. But I thought I'd shake things up a bit this time.

"Oh, I forgot. In addition to my regular family refills, I've also got a new one for me," I say, sliding the prescription across the counter.

"Welllll, one for you now? Getting a little daring are we?" Ralph pushes his spectacles up higher on his nose. He squints to read the slip of paper. "JOAN, get me a ....beeep beeep beep." (I plead the fifth here, on the grounds that mentioning my medication might incriminate me.)

They ask me for my identification, which is quite humorous really. They've looked at my driver's license so many times that they already know the history behind why my hair is blonde in the snapshot. But they still take a good long look, just to make sure I'm me.

Then, while they mix and shake their wares behind the counter, I pour out my woes, my sob-stories, and my meaningless drivel. They listen and nod. "Aint it the truth?"

And then....gulp...I get my whopping tab. That sobers me up pretty quickly. I think about all the marvelous things I could have bought with that load of cash. Sigh. In all honesty, I could probably feed my family for two weeks. And that's after insurance. Quickly I hand over my debit card.

"Well, I guess I'd better be headin' home. Thanks Ralph. See you, Joan."

"We'll see you tomorrow, then."

"Tomorrow? Well... yeah...most likely."

I'll admit, I'm grateful to live in an age where insulin is made synthetically, and where kids who are struggling with troublesome behaviors have options. Yes, I'm grateful to have all these treatments available for my family. At the same time, managing so many meds gets a bit overwhelming. You know it's gotten bad when the bag of medication you carry out the door gives you a shoulder ache.

Hmmm, maybe I could get a prescription for that, too.

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Learn more about Kristyn Crow

Kristyn Crow is the mother of seven children, and the author of three children's books. Visit her website at www.kristyncrow.com.

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choochie (12) 11 Oct 2006 07:13 AM

I loved this article. The author is so creative and humerous with her writing skills. I can't wait to see what she writes next!

Kristyn Crow (2546) 11 Oct 2006 01:14 PM

It's fun to get goofy now and then. As for my next article, how about Proprioceptive Dysfunction--now there's creativity and humor for ya! Just teasing. Thank you CHOOCHIE, I appreciate your kind words.