Could a Point System Help Your Child with ADHD?

by Kristyn Crow | More from this Blogger

03 Sep 2007 08:32 PM

Experts are suggesting that parents of children with ADHD and other behavioral difficulties should try using a point (or credit) system for discipline and motivation. In a recent PEOPLE magazine article, I read about a special camp for children with ADHD run by Dr. Karen Fleiss. The camp gives points for good behaviors, and takes them away for less appropriate ones. Campers who achieve a certain number of points during the week are rewarded with a special Friday field trip. In the article, Dr. Fleiss says that the point system helps motivate these kids to choose the right behavior.

With a point system, the parent is no longer the "bad guy," arbitrarily making threats or giving punishments. Instead, the child learns that if he misses out on a particular privilege, there's nobody to blame but himself. As point totals grow or shrink, the child is able to see the number of privileges increase or decrease. Thus, there is more personal accountability for behavior and fewer power struggles.

But a point system seems so complicated!

It doesn't have to be. Here's how to get your program started. You're going to create three lists. The first is a "Lose Points" list. You'll want to create a thorough list of every problem behavior you've dealt with, and even some you haven't. (With these lists, be specific without being overly exhaustive. Try to use terms that will cover a lot of possibilities.) Here's an example:

Your next list will be all the behaviors you'd like to encourage, called a "Gain Points" list. Here's an example:

Next, you'll want to determine a point value (or negative point value) for each category of behaviors. For example, violent actions could be negative ten (-10) and less serious infractions could be negative five (-5). Positive behaviors should be given points depending on how much effort is shown. Personally, I would not set a point value for every single behavior, but one per grouping.

Last, you will create a list of rewards for points earned. To make the point system work, you'll want to list every single perk the child has, (besides vital things like eating) and give each one a point value. You won't need to create a list of penalties, because the child is automatically penalized when his points don't add up to the perks he wants. For example, if your child doesn't have enough points to watch television, he's restricted from TV without you "declaring" it.

Set point values higher for bigger rewards, like going to a movie, and lower for daily perks like television viewing. Ask yourself...how many times would I like to see good behaviors in a day? That total could be a "television viewing" value. How many good behaviors in a week? That total could earn a trip to the movies. Allow for a couple mess-ups. Base the values on what is most motivating for your child. It's likely you'll have to adjust values somewhat as you test out your system.

You may want to laminate your lists without point values, and then use a dry-erase marker to indicate the numerical values and keep track of totals. This will make adjustments easier. Your child will then get to "buy" daily rewards and save up for larger ones.

Before implementing your program, you'll need to sit down and carefully discuss it with your son or daughter. It might help to compare the point system to a video game. Explain that the child will gain or lose points based on what she chooses. Provide your son or daughter with a notebook to keep track of points earned. You should explain that PARENTS have the ultimate authority to give or remove points, and points cannot be asked or begged for. Also, parents need not follow the child around, giving points for every single action. Only the behaviors that stand out need receive (or lose) points. But remember that good behaviors are less noticeable, so pay closer attention to those.

Be prepared for your child to "test" your resolve and try to thwart your plan. Stick to it and remember that you have absolute power to give "extra credit" points when needed or adjust numbers. The system works best when your child is very involved in seeing his point totals and recognizes the pay-off for good behaviors. Start each new week back at ZERO.

Will this work on a younger child?

You'll need to simplify your lists to very basic two-word rules, like "no hitting." You may want to use icons or pictures for children who don't read. You could use stickers in place of numbers, or smiley faces velcroed to a strip so the child can see the numbers increasing or decreasing.

Kristyn Crow is the author of this blog. Visit her website by clicking here. Some links on this blog may have been generated by outside sources are not necessarily endorsed by Kristyn Crow.

Learn more about Kristyn Crow

Kristyn Crow is the mother of seven children, and the author of three children's books. Visit her website at www.kristyncrow.com.

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reneemags (5) 10 Jan 2008 06:33 PM

my concern is that...am i "punishing" my daughter for behaviors that she has no control over?

Kristyn Crow (2546) 10 Jan 2008 07:52 PM

I understand your concern, but the point system allows for accountability. One of the difficulties kids with ADHD have is that they often act without thinking. Impulse control is hard for them. A point system helps teach them to think about consequences and make better choices. The reality is that in the real world there ARE consequences for anti-social, aggressive, or unruly behaviors. If these kids don't learn this concept now, while they're young, they'll have to learn it as adults the hard way. And the adult world will be a lot less forgiving.

Also, I personally wouldn't say these kids have "no control" over their behaviors. Sure, it's harder for them to control their impulses and stay focused. MUCH harder than it is for typical kids, even. But there are all kinds of intervention strategies they can learn to calm themselves down and stay on task. In some cases, medication is helpful. But to not hold these children accountable for their behaviors is putting them at a disadvantage.

The point system may not be the right strategy for every family, but many have used it with great success. The good thing about it is you can adapt it any way you want. If your daughter has certain behaviors she absolutely can't control, don't doc points for them. Or you can eliminate the point subtraction ("lose points") and only have her earn points towards privileges or rewards. Perhaps your daughter would do better earning points and not losing them. Still, I think it's vital to provide consequences to kids, and the point system helps them to "see" and predict them in a much more immediate, concrete way.

GboroCollege (50) 01 Apr 2009 04:14 PM

I am a 22 year old college student that was diagnosed with ADD when I was about 16 and I agree with the points system it gives the child something to strive for and also will get punished if he or she breaks these rules. The one thing that helped me out the most was getting someone to teach me better study habits. It took me until I got to college to find out my most productive way of studying. The main problem that ADD children have to over come is procrastination we need structure and schedules.